guides
Big Sister and Big Brother Gifts: 8 Ideas When Baby Arrives
Big sister gifts and big brother gifts for when a new baby arrives: eight ideas, who gives each one, and when to hand it over to the older child.
Big sister gifts and big brother gifts are presents for the older child when a new baby arrives, often handed over at the first meeting so they have something of their own to open while the adults look at the baby. The best ones are about the older child, not the baby: a book, a doll to look after, something to do while you feed, and time with you.
Below are eight gifts for older siblings when a new baby arrives, grouped by who gives them: the baby, the parents, and the visitors and grandparents who come to meet the newborn. If the baby is due near Christmas, keep this present separate from the Christmas ones. Our screen-free Christmas gifts cover those.
What are good big sister gifts?
Good big sister gifts are things that belong to the older child: a picture book about a new baby, a doll of their own to care for, a box of quiet things to do while you feed, and a voucher for time with you. The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) suggests giving your older child a special gift once the baby comes, and making time for them alone.
A slogan T-shirt is fine, but it only announces the new role. A book or a doll gives them something to do in it.
Are big brother gifts any different?
No. The same presents suit a big brother or a big sister. A doll to look after is as good a gift for a boy as for a girl, and the AAP suggests it for any older child. Choose by their age and what they like doing, not by a colour or a slogan.
Which gift suits which age of older sibling?
The AAP describes the older child's reaction in three age bands: toddlers of 1 to 2, preschoolers of 2 to 4, and school-age children of 5 and over. It notes that children over 5 are usually less threatened by a new baby than younger ones, though they may resent the attention the baby gets. Each gift below gives the ages it suits best and a rough price. For a two- or three-year-old who likes to copy you, our guide to yoga for toddlers has ideas for moving together.
By budget:
- Free: idea 6
- Free to £20: idea 8
- Under £10: ideas 1, 3 and 7
- £10 to £20: ideas 2 and 5
- £20 to £40: idea 4
Eight big sister and big brother gifts, by who gives them
From the baby, at the first meeting
1. A picture book about a new baby in the family
For: an older child who likes being read to. Ages: 2 to 6. Cost: under £10.
The AAP suggests reading picture books about a new baby with your older child. Given at the first meeting, it's something to share on the sofa while the newborn sleeps. Choose one where the older sibling is the hero, not the baby.
2. A doll or soft baby of their own
For: a child who wants to copy everything you do. Ages: 2 to 6. Cost: £10 to £20.
The AAP suggests giving the older child a doll so they can take care of "their" baby. Add a small blanket or a sling, so they can feed, wind and settle their baby while you do the same with yours.
3. A photo of them as a baby, framed for their room
For: any older child, especially one asking "was I that small?" Ages: 3 to 8. Cost: under £10 for a frame.
Both the AAP and NHS 111 Wales suggest showing your child photos of themselves as a baby. Framed for their room, it says they were here first, and that they were once just as small.
From the parents, in the first weeks
4. A patch of floor that's theirs: a mat with numbered poses
For: a child who needs a patch of floor that's theirs. Ages: 3 to 8. Cost: £34.99, and this one is ours.
The Freedom Flow mat has 15 numbered poses engraved into the surface, nearly all of them on the floor, so they can roll it out beside the feeding chair and work along on their own. It rolls up with a carry strap when the floor's needed for baby things. If your new big sister is two, it's a better third birthday present.
5. A box of quiet things for feeding time
For: a toddler who wants you most at feeds. Ages: 2 to 6. Cost: £10 to £20.
Sticker scenes, a magnetic drawing board, threading cards, kept in a box that only comes out for feeds. NHS 111 Wales advises finding your toddler something to do before you start feeding. Check the age labels too: the Office for Product Safety and Standards warns that small parts can be a choking hazard.
6. A book of "just us" vouchers
For: an older child of any age who misses having you to themselves. Ages: 3 to 8. Cost: free.
Hand-written: a trip to the park, a bath with extra bubbles, choosing tea. The AAP suggests planning time alone with your older child, and NHS 111 Wales says they'll still need one-to-one time with you. The vouchers make that time a present they can hold.
From visitors and grandparents
7. Something small and wrapped, by the front door
For: the older child when visitors arrive with gifts for the baby. Ages: 2 to 8. Cost: under £10 for a few.
The AAP notes that some family and friends give the older child a small gift when they bring presents for the baby. Parents: keep three or four small things wrapped by the door, so any visitor can hand one over. Visitors: bring one.
8. A day out with a grandparent
For: a child who'd love a day that isn't about the baby. Ages: 3 to 8. Cost: free to £20.
The AAP says a new baby is a good time for other family members to spend time alone with older children. The present is the day itself: a train ride, the swings, a café with a big-kid drink. Our guide to gifts for grandchildren has more for grandparents.
Should big sister gifts come from the baby?
Giving the older child a present "from the baby" is a family custom, not a rule, and no health or parenting body has set it. In our view it works best for children under about five, who enjoy the story. An older child will know who chose it, so let big brother gifts and big sister gifts come from you, with a card that says why.
When should you give the older sibling their gift?
Give it at the first meeting, whether that's at the hospital or at home, so the older child has something to unwrap while everyone looks at the baby. The AAP suggests having someone bring your older child to the hospital to meet their new sibling. If you're choosing a present for a big brother when the new baby arrives, keep it wrapped and in the hospital bag.
Combining gifts for the first meeting and the first weeks
- The first meeting: the picture book and the framed baby photo, from the baby.
- Feeding time: the quiet box for now, and the mat once they're three.
- Two older children: one mat each, standing poses for the one who wants to move and floor poses for the one who'd rather sit. See the two pose sequences side by side; two or more mats are 10 per cent off.
Choosing for a new big sister or brother? All our kids' yoga mats are £34.99, with free UK delivery and 30-day returns. If you want ideas for the first few goes together, our guide on how to start yoga with your child covers them.
What if the older child ignores the present?
Some older children ignore every present and want only to be carried, like the baby. That's normal. The AAP says to expect your child to regress a little, and NHS 111 Wales says babyish behaviour is completely normal and not to punish it. A present won't fix those weeks, and it doesn't need to. Put it away and bring it out on a quieter day.
If you're worried about how your older child is coping, talk to your health visitor or GP.
Frequently asked questions
What should you buy an older sibling when a new baby arrives?
A present that's about them, given when they first meet the baby, and then some time that's just theirs. A picture book about a new baby or a doll of their own to look after both work from about two. Add a book of "just us" vouchers, because the AAP and the NHS both stress one-to-one time with the older child.
What's a good big sister gift for a 3-year-old?
A doll or soft baby to look after, a picture book about a new baby, or a mat with the poses marked in, since three is where the age range for ours begins. Three-year-olds copy the animal poses with a little help. The same answers work just as well for a big brother of three.
What's a good big brother gift for a toddler?
For a two-year-old, keep it simple: a sturdy picture book with babies in it, a soft doll to cuddle and feed, or a framed photo of him as a baby. Our mat is designed for ages 3 to 8, so for a toddler it makes a better third birthday present than a new-baby one.
What should visitors bring for the older sibling?
Something small for the older child as well as the baby, and five minutes of attention before asking to hold the newborn. The AAP suggests family and friends spend time with the older child when they visit. Stickers, a small book or a bubble wand are plenty: being remembered is what counts.
